Not About Sarah -- Sorta

Silence. Conspiracy to Deceive?

I've been thinking about silence.

What silence? " Many of Sarah's classmates know about her journey. Many of their parents know, a few close family members know, heck some even nearly-total strangers know about "it". The dean, the counselor at school, and a few neighbors know. The police know.

What silence? So far we've effectively stone-walled most cousins and their families. People at work. People we occasionalize socialize with. Most people we know at church. Most neighbors. Few people at the family support groups at Fairbanks orAl-Anon or Nar-Anon know because we haven't reached out lately.

So .... pretty interesting. Conspiracy of silence pays off with denied support. Stupid. We're now committed to increased attendance at support programs.

Just a few more thoughts or rather, to the meat of the matter, incomplete thoughts! Is it a lie to be vague or unreasonably hopeful when people ask about college this fall? "She's enrolled at IUPUI" is an incomplete answer. At this point there is less than a slim chance she will attend late August.

We don't exactly want to expose these family-facts or expose ourselves to "judgment". Good parents take better care of their children. Better parents don't have these problems with their kids. This doesn't happen in Carmel. Are we hypocrites or people just worried about the wrong things? Is it better to keep a stiff upper lip and "grin it and bear it"?

The answers we're pursuing include more intense engagement with the "nons", Al and Nar, as well as engaging the Fairbanks resources.

I wonder how many people within 3 square miles are facing the same problems?

Thanks to all we've talked to. We're not hiding and unavailable, we're just distracted. This blog is one of my ways of keeping you informed on your schedule and mine. Mostly "silence" from the Ranch. Susan talked to Sarah's counselor and it is just too soon to have much to discuss. Oh, real progress! Suze ratted Sarah out for having her cell phone. No more enablement.